Where two rivers meet

file:///Users/mac/Desktop/%22This%20Gift%20Of%20Life%22%20by%20Eve%20Christoph%20for%20My%20Daughter%202%202.movA girl friend of mine was asked for her hand in marriage and found herself paralyzed with fear. Her husband to be was a really wonderful person. he made her life better in every way. She could be her free spirited artistic self and he would be overjoyed to be the grounded earth for her. He loved her winged ways and was already paying most bills and even doing more than his share of homemaking chores. But she was wondering " why?…why should I do this? No one has ever given me a good reason. we already love each other. Why marriage?" Yet being married was a big deal to her boyfriend. It was so important that he kept pressuring her because until then he would not feel fully on the love path he craved. What was missing that this ritual would give him? 

So I invited her to do a ritual with me to find out why and if…

We went to the place where two rivers meet. I said to her "this is the river of life. You either stand on the bank and watch, or you dive in. But the only way to dive in is to make decisions. Today this is the river of Sacred-Marriage. But you will never see the other side of this river or feel its waters unless you make the decision to say yes! Do you want to see what it feels like?" "Yes, I'm curious" she said "ok so provisionally make the decision to get married and dive in and I'll meet you on the other side of the river."

On the big black undulating rocks we lay down side by side to ponder. "how do you feel? " I asked her. She looked radiant and said. " I feel so refreshed, I feel so alive, I feel totally altered. I feel like I'm tripping." 

I said "this is the way our beloved is when she or he feels totally loved and supported. This is the side of the river where deep love blooms. Unless you go all the way into commitment you will never see your beloved in this way of being. On the other side of the river you will only see who they are as a closed rose."

As our meditation continued she began to ask herself more questions. "In the back of my heart is this picture that wont let me loose. It's of my first boyfriend. I just always pictured my husband whould feel and look the same to me as he did. He was a super handsome guy and that made me feel so beautiful to be by his side. I'm not as visually dazzeled by my partner now as I was then. Is that shallow?" 

"No its not shallow" I suggested " beauty is a craving we all have. And its never going away. Creation is so beautiful! We need the nourishment of beauties ecstasy! 

BUT WHAT WE DONT REALIZE IS THAT OUR BELOVED CANNOT SHOW US HIS OR HER INNER BEAUTY UNTILL

 WE SEEK TO SEE THEIR BEAUTY.

 So in a sense we make our beloved into the most desirable one on earth by treating them as the one we have been waiting for. "

She asked "so what you are saying is that any one could be the one if we treat them that way they become the way we focus on them to be?"

"Well in the book "Committed" by the same lady who wrote "eat pray love" She goes to a remote south east Asian village to ask about romantic love. But no one can figure out what she is talking about. "Any man will do", they say. "Any woman will do."  There is truth in this. Our modern lives have gotten more specific now. we are not just raising children and making crafts and being farmers or hunters, now for the first time in history food has never been so easy to get as it is for modern people. So we can focus on esoteric careers. We want partners who can walk a very specific unique path with us. But how much beauty we get to see has more to do with our own way of opening our vision to be more inclusive of the multitudes and varieties of beauty. it has more to do with shinning a kind of love towards others that causes the flowers around us to open!

All I know is that when a dear beloved of mine found me I was in rough physical shape. I had spent many years in a relationship with some one who did not find me attractive and who pushed away my love. Eventually my beauty became buried beneath the belief that i was not worthy or lovable or beautiful. But this new man said he was irresistibly drawn to me because of the courageous nature of my heart. But then he told me I looked like I was in terrible shape (which was true , I couldn't even dance if i wanted to at the time) He said He was used to a different body type and that he didn't know how to reconcile his attraction to me with how bad I looked compared to the glamourous women of his home land that he was used to desiring. I told him I agreed with him. I could no longer recognize myself in the mirror. I was committed to getting healthy again  and even losing weight if I could.

 So then he did an amazing thing. He said " I see you there. I believe you will come back to your health and your health is enough beauty for me. I will commit to you now as you are and I will hold the image of you in perfect health every morning in  my meditation. Lets make a sacred agreement together " So we made an intention agreement to understand the nature of what we wanted to do together, spiritually, artistically, Sexually, financially, emotionally, intellectually, practically. We ended up remaking this agreement every three months over two years. And my body completely transformed during this time. I became the one most desirable to him instead of least desirable. My body transformed because he was willing to offer me love in action that was in responce to me, ever changing. He was giving me love on my own terms. (that is an amazing story for another time!) But what this means is that your beloved might have tangled contorted energy right now. He is not very attractive because you are putting up a shield when he tries to love you. And this makes him feel sick. How he will look and feel when you give him full permission to be that amazing is what you will only see when you actively choose to see him there before he enters the zone with you!"

My girl friend looked so relieved."there is one more thing to do" I said to her. "Jump back in the river from this side and swim down stream to where the two rivers join. See how you feel when his river meets your river"

I watched her swimming to where the two rivers join. Then I dove in to join her down stream to hear how she felt " It's warm!" she was musing quietly,"The water is warmer now!" I knew this would be the case, because at "two Rivers (or sunburn beach) A deep cold river joins a golden warm shallow river. Some times its a whirlpool of cold and hot! I wrote a song for you about this place! Its the place where two rivers meet! here are the lyrics….

 Where two rivers meet © Eve Christoph 2013 

I slip into your silken depths

I slide my hand along your chest

chorus;

River rock lover rock me, rock me

River rock lover rock me

River rock lover rock me, in your river bed

verse 1;

With your permission may iI slide along here

Bounce on your palm without my bare fear

To lose this self and gain the self

To lose myself and find, love in the losing!

chorus;

River rock lover rock me, rock me

River rock lover rock me

River rock lover rock me, in your river bed

verse 2;

My body undulates in the rapids of your wake

The water swirls cold and hot all around me

Two rivers , destined to meet,

carry me down stream where we become complete

Where two rivers swirl in opposite curl

****instrumental***

segway;

two rivers becoming one, 

two rivers becoming one,

verse 3;

We are rich together beyond measure

rich in the grace of the waters sweet taste

Rich in the waters pleasure so innate

Rich in the waters life giving faith

Rich in creative flow, finding the source to which we go

bridge;

All we need do is, keep flowing as we do

All we need do is keep flowing as we do

Two rivers becoming one! 

two rivers becoming one!

chorus;

River rock lover rock me, rock me

River rock lover rock me

River rock lover rock me, in your river bed

bridge;

Two rivers becoming one, 

Two rivers becoming one,

To lose this self and gain the self

To lose myself and find, love in the losing!